Sunday, October 2nd

I worked with the other dish crew last night and it was tough.  It was my third night in a row on dirty take off which is the most physically demanding station on dish crew. 
I only agreed to do it because I worked with Rick who works like a machine.  But the crew's overall attitude is negative and the group lacks cohesion.  Also we had a supervisor who is young and inexperienced.  She is a really good person who is trying very hard but needs more management training and a good mentor. 
But is helped me to feel grateful that I work with such a great crew.  I love my crew even more after working with the other crew.  And it helps me to realize how hard we work. 
My friend who was visiting left and I was feeling sad, it was like a piece of home left with her. I am feeling homesick these days, not for my city but for my friends and family.  I am going to visit family in a few weeks (three!) and I can't wait to see everyone.  Also after I finish my term here my friend and I are talking about driving down to Florida to see my family.  I would be good to have us all together again. 

Tuesday September 27th

This has been a month of adjustments for me.  New seva with a new schedule, a new roommate and a crop of new volunteers.  I find myself wanting to be alone more that usual and the early waking insomnia is getting a little worse its now four or five days a week instead of the pattern of three.  I tried doing three different things thinking that they may have been the source but nothing to date has worked better than sprinkling my sheets with eucalyptus oil.  I worry that it is bothering my room mate who I think is just being polite about it cause she's Canadian.  So most days I am mentally tired but am able to work dish crew just fine and I love the adrenaline rush of peak busy time when I do dirty take off (taking the dirty trays off the carousel).   I am getting better at clean take off but last night with three hundred people (a light night) and one person short there were lots of stops and starts.  Also I need to get this off my chest, the supervisor spent most of the time she was supposed to be helping me polishing cups rather than putting them in the soaking bin and moving on to other more strenuous projects.  Then when I tried to put away the clean take off items she did not do she sprayed my feet with water because she wanted to wash the floors early to get out early.  I can see now why at every share she talks about her life being so chaotic.  She makes decisions without thinking things through (which I am also guilty of) and doesn't have any time management skills. 

Friday September 23rd

I have been busy adjusting to my new schedule, I now work 1:30 p.m. - 9:00 p.m. but we usually get out around 8:45 p.m.  cause we are just soooooo motivated to get the work done.  I work with a great crew of all guys, they cut me a little slack and don't ask me to take out the garbage but I do everything else including washing down the Hobart, sweeping, scrubbing and squegeeing the floors. 
I had been losing weight steadily but now that I am working such a physical job I am losing more weight each week.  I like that I am losing weight but it is also a drag because pants I thought I could wear through the winter are fitting me now so it does not look like they will fit in three months.  This will mean more trips to Goodwill and I plan on doing a Goodwill tour in Florida when I visit in October.  I can always mail the clothes up here. 
So I am tired and going to sleep, Goodnight blog.

Monday, September 19th

It's been a busy week, I am still adjusting to a new seva schedule and the temperature has dropped significantly the past two weeks.  So no more swimming in the lake and I had to go home to pick up my winter clothes.  I have a duffel bag full of sweaters and jeans that need washing and I feel y usual ungroundedness from traveling from high energy to contemplative energy.
Every day I feel so grateful to be living in community, my job is in the dish room so it is steamy, sweaty, swampy work but I love it.  I work with a great group of people and I am happy.  How nice is it to be able to say that I am happy.  All the old timers in the dish room say tell me how you feel in a month.  I think I will still feel grateful to know that I am doing a seva where I can be both mindful and be of service.
Also I am doing more energy work on my fellow volunteers which is another way I feel I can be of service.

Tuesday, September 13th

I received two sincere compliments today, this morning a male friend told me that I was like Indian Summer in New York, sunny but with a bite. We are co-hosting a film festival here at Hill House.  I have not been sleeping well lately (OK the past two months) waking up early and not able to go back to sleep.  Sometimes I drowse but no real sleep.  It is much easier to do dish crew than computer on five hours sleep.
So the other compliment was from my ex-roomie who told me I had a nice voice and should consider voice over. This was a surprise because I think I have a very New York sounding voice and I don't like the way I sound when I record it.  Also I don't sing well so I think my voice is not so good.  But it was nice to hear that and I may think about recording books for the blind or something like that.  

Saturday, September 10th

I started my new seva and I love it.  It is everything I wanted to be part of a crew, to have a physical job which also allows me to try to be mindful.  It is hectic at times and other times more contemplative.  I miss my boss a little but I am enjoying my time off.  Today I walked with my new roomie to town and we took a bus to the nearest drugstore.  I bought bandaids for my blisters and organic decaf coffee.  All in all a good trip. 

I found out that my roomie had a dog sled team (8 dogs purebred Inuit sled dogs) up in the Arctic Circle.  She is originally from outside Toronto which I always associate with underground malls and Margaret Atwood.  I have stopped sneezing so whatever I was allergic to has passed or I have gotten used to it.  

This weekend we have a famous presenter who has a large following from the compulsive overeating community.  So it is Fat Girl Central here in community and I am loving it!  There are Fat Girls all over the building and grounds.   I find it so comforting to be around so many large and lovely ladies.  I have been using the word Fat Girls and it is making some people uncomfortable especially when  I include myself in that group.  Too Bad! as they say here in community, maybe that's your edge.  

Thursday, September 8th

When I decided to live in community I made two vows, one to do whatever was asked of me (to the best of my ability) and the other was to say yes to whatever the universe offered me.  To date this has worked out very well for me.  I asked for a new seva because I wanted to stop playing it safe and I received exactly what I asked for.  I have a team, a crew, a beautiful loving group of beings who I know will love and support me.  I have a job that gives me a little cash.  I have a workout that I love YogaDance.  I am losing weight at a slow and steady rate and feeling really fit.  My meditation practice is regular.  I feel like I set the bar pretty high for the universe and the universe said "Watch out because I am bringing"
So universe thank you I so am grateful and I am going to continue to say yes.